I am excited for Angela! She is going to her first BlogHer convention in New York, New York.

She has never been there and really doesn't enjoy big cities so we will see how this all pans out for her. She can't wait to meet some of the people that she follows and I hope that she has an amazing, wonderful time there. She will be missed here at the homestead but we will all plug along for a few days without her.

It was funny, the other week Angela was talking to her mother on the phone and they were discussing her impending travel to the convention... Her mother wondered how I was going to be on my own with three children and her 'gone!' I had to laugh. Angela's mother knows full well that I am the one who takes care of the kids all day. I am the one who cleans house and cooks the meals and does most of the shopping with and without the children in tow. It makes me shake my head that even though Jan (Angela's mom) knows this intellectually, she still falls back on old stereotypes when a quick thought passes.

Times are changing and men are not the bumbling, brutish, know-nothings that earn a paycheck and then collapse on the sofa or special armchair. I love being the one the girls come to at all hours. I love cooking and get a sense of real accomplishment when the house looks good and toys aren't in all the hallways and covering the rooms. It will take another generation possibly for the intrenched attitudes to change, but I think that they will change. 

The events in Colorado the other night are a terrible tragedy. I pray for the families of the people who died and for those who are still in the hospital. Life is so short and you really never know when and where you could meet your end. It really makes you appreciate the people and the time that you have.

I have read of several people that used themselves to shield a loved one or their children from harm during that rampage and I am amazed at the courage those people exhibited and wonder if I would be able to do the same thing. I would like to think so. I would like to think that my love for my children and wife would help me overcome the abject terror of being in that type of situation. I guess you don't know until faced with it.

Well I will sign off and try and get this sinking, sick feeling out of the pit of my stomach and live life hoping something like the Aurora, Colorado shooting never happens again.

Staying at home as a man in this day and age doesn't seem to hold the stigma that it might have in decades past, but it still holds a bit of a stigma in my own mind. Its funny, the contradictions that run through your head as you change the diapers for the third time that day or get the girls into their seats for lunch; I love being here and I love being the one that takes care of everyone, but am I doing the right thing?

I went through four years of college to earn a degree and another two to get a Masters that I am not using and might never get to use because of the economy. I wanted to be an academic librarian but universities and colleges are downsizing. There isn't really anywhere to go right now. My other problem is that I have been a stay-at-home dad now since our son, Nicholas, was born in 2006. Any contacts or references that I had after Library school have essentially gotten stale. So from a professional standpoint I am a no go as far as hiring.

All of the above aside I love being here for the girls during the day. They are a joy from their big smiles and jumping in their cribs in the morning, to the cuddles in the evening when it is time to go to bed. They are so different from their brother it just is amazing to me on an almost daily basis.